At first, it takes a while for Jaime Mor’s mentee to open up to him. As they sit together at a local Tim Hortons in Maple, and sip on Ice Caps, Mor tries to encourage his mentee to say what’s on his mind.
[su_quote] “What’s going on?” Mor asks. But his mentee’s only answer is, at first, “Ah nothing.” [/su_quote]
It is only after the third time Mor patiently asks him how he is doing that his mentee eventually tells him he is being verbally and emotionally bullied at school.
For the second year law school student at Osgoode, who is currently a mentor at the Peer Project-Youth Assisting Youth agency, it’s moments like this one that he dedicates his time to.
“When you get to get involved in the life of a young person and you get to see what kind of difference you can make, that’s a great feeling,” Mor says as he smiles.
Mor finds great joy in helping his mentee find solace at a time when he faces challenges in school.
Since he was a teenager, Mor has dreamt of being an older brother and a “pillar of support” to a child struggling with what he had struggled with in the past, including verbal and emotional bullying, as well as self-esteem and body image issues, he says.
His dream started to take form after seeing an advertisement by the Peer Project when he got on the subway in 2010.
[su_quote] “I saw this big purple ad that said ‘do you think you’re tough enough,’” he says. “It kind of caught my eye and I remember that I wanted to do this at some point, so I got involved.” [/su_quote]
The Peer Project—located in North York—is a unique and newly rebranded non-profit charitable organization. They match children ages six to 15—who have been diagnosed as at-risk (meaning they experience emotional, behavioural, social, and/or cultural difficulties) and are referred to by a teacher, guidance counselor, a settlement worker, a child welfare worker, doctor or a parent—with fully trained and screened youth volunteers ages 16 to 29.
Since its inception in 1976, the program has guided over 30,000 children and volunteers, says 61-year-old John van Rhee, the director of programs and client services.
Keeping at-risk youth out of danger and in the hands of caring, supportive volunteers, like Mor, is an important part of what the Peer Project is designed to do, says 43-year-old Ed Carlson, manager of operations and administration.
[su_quote]“Ninety per cent of the kids that come to us stay in school, they stay out of jail and they don’t end up in the juvenile justice system,” says Carlson.[/su_quote]
Mor officially joined the organization in March 2010.
As a part of the Peer Project’s prerequisite screening assessment, a volunteer recruiter visited Mor at his home to interview him. The recruiter asked him a number of questions, including the most important one: “Why do you want to do this?”
Mor was then given the requirements for the program.
“We stress to the volunteers that once they commit to this program they have to stick with it for a year because a lot of these kids have been disappointed or have lost trust in a parent in the past,” says van Rhee.
Following his assessment, Mor participated in a five-hour training session that covered subjects like child behavioural management, child abuse, as well as culture and diversity.
Mor finally had the opportunity to become a big brother to an at-risk child on August 25, 2010. This is when he met his current 15-year-old mentee, Michael.
Raised by his single mother, Michael dealt with body image issues, verbal and emotional bullying, as well as peer pressure and low self-esteem in elementary school at the age of 11.
“I had gone through that stuff specifically and it was stuff that he couldn’t really talk to his friends about, because often they were the cause. There was also stuff that he didn’t really want to talk to his mom about or his sister,” Mor says.
During this time Mor typically gave Michael advice, including “play your own game.”
It is advice that his father used to tell him when he was younger.
It means, “Be confident and know that you are a good person and you are a cool kid,” says Mor. “Don’t let other people dictate your life or dictate anything about you.”
While the Peer Project sets up activities for the mentors and mentees, Mor and Michael usually do their own activities. If it isn’t playing arcade games at the Dave and Buster’s in Woodbridge, or walking around at Vaughan Mills, it’s spending quality time being active. They usually go to a local park in Maple to shoot hoops on the basketball court, kick a football on the field, or play Frisbee with each other.
“What’s great about it from a mentor perspective is you get to do a lot of the stuff that you are now supposed to be too old to do,” Mor says.
Having now been together for three and a half years, Mor essentially has become a male role model to Michael, van Rhee says. He does things that Michael likes “that maybe his father can’t or won’t do with him.”
Mor also manages and directs a pro bono clinic called Fair Change Community Services—which is a student-led legal clinic that offers free legal assistance to those in the homeless community.
As well, he represents the Peer Project at United Way of Greater Toronto, fundraises for the organization, and sits as a member of the organization’s board of directors.
And even though both Mor and Michael are currently busy with school, Mor is still very committed to him and The Peer project, says van Rhee.
[su_quote]As a part of Mor’s general philosophy, which he has adopted from his Jewish parents, he believes it is important to “contribute to the world in some positive way.” And, he is trying to do just that.[/su_quote]
Mor continues to open “his heart and his life to this boy and he’s making a difference. His mom is quite appreciative of what he’s done for Michael and Michael thinks he’s the cat’s meow,” van Rhee says and then lightly chuckles.
It is because of Mor’s unconditional dedication to Michael and his general contribution to the community that has led Carlson to call him a hero.
“I think Jaime and specifically as well as all of our mentors are heroes,” says Carlson. “These kids are already right on the verge of dropping out of school, already truant and within a couple of months mentors like Jaime are turning these kids’ lives around. I mean to me, that’s a hero.”
Sandra Owusu
Contributor
Image source: Jaime Mor
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