Let’s talk about sex, baby

Matt Dionne | Sports and Health Editor

Featured image: What YU need to know about safe sex, including types of effective contraceptives and whether a person under the influence can consent to sexual activity. | Jasmine Wiradharma

Any depiction of high school or college in movies and television is essentially a real-time version of Tinder that happens to also have classes.

While real life isn’t exactly like the movies, it’s true that for many people, university is a time of self-discovery and exploration, which includes one’s sexuality. Many people don’t discover their true sexual orientation until they reach post-secondary and experience the freedom it offers.

While sexual self-discovery is an important part of a person’s development, it’s also extremely important that people know how to do so in a safe manner that will ensure both they and their partner are protected.

York has a Sexual Health Team dedicated to providing all the information students need to know regarding sexual health.

“Students’ experiences with sexual health are incredibly diverse. We have spoken with students who have had no sexual education and we have spoken with some who have received great sexual education,” say Manpreet Gulri and Andrea Pothiboon of York’s Sexual Health Team.

Sadly, they noticed that there is a large portion of students who have received uninformative or biased sexual education.

“Sexual education is extremely unregulated and that has led to such a varied response and knowledge-base in students. We find that a lot of the information we present in our programming is new to students,” they add.

“We focus on informing students about consent, in terms of what it is and looks like, sexual pleasure, contraceptive methods, and healthy relationship practices. It’s important for students to know […] what their options are and we do our best to provide resources pertaining to that,” say Gulri and Pothiboon.

A common misconception about ‘safe sex’ is that there even is safe sex. According to Gulri and Pothiboon, the only truly ‘safe’ sex is abstinence, masturbation or outercourse—sexual stimulation without penile penitration. However, the use of contraceptives, such as condoms, birth control pills and dental dams, contributes to safer sex.

Lately, many universities in North America have been accused of perpetuating rape culture, so it’s extremely important for students to know what consent is.

“Consent is two things: a positive response—as in an enthusiastic ‘yes’—and it must be ongoing. Consent is not a blanket ‘yes’ at the beginning of a sexual activity and then acts as a free pass. Consent must be continuous throughout the sexual encounter, whatever that may be,” say Gulri and Pothiboon. “If someone no longer wants to engage in sexual contact […] then you must stop.”

So how does alcohol impact consent?

“It is, unfortunately, very common for people to perceive a very drunk person as one who is capable of consenting. However, one of the elements of consent is that it can only be given by someone who is in their right mind. If someone is slurring, plastered or passed out, they cannot consent to sexual activity.

“We have heard people confuse a drunken ‘yes’ or simply the absence of a ‘no’ from someone under the influence of alcohol or drugs as consent when that is absolutely not the case,” they add.

If you want to learn more about sexual health, York’s Sexual Health Team offers a plethora of programs, including a Sexual Health Outreach Program. They have drop-in hours every week on Monday afternoons in South Ross 172 and on Thursday afternoons in Vari Hall.